Hybrid or Hoopty for SHTF day? That is the question.

by Ranger Man on September 14, 2008

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Well aren’t you all lucky. You would’ve received a post a day or so ago, but alas the database to SHTFblog went all crazy and shit and wouldn’t let me access the admin account – no way, no how. Shit hit the fan at SHTFblog. I tried getting a new password, it didn’t recognize my e-mail address, all kinds of nothing was going on for the past few days, and I seriously thought – this is the end. In some ways it was a blessing in disguise, because part of me is always leaning toward some other project since I don’t make much at all from the effort I put into this thing, and fewer people seem to be using the Amazon search bar for their shopping, so it’s kinda like . . . whatever. But then I read comments from Flower Man and feel great inspiration, so this blog is always a love/hate kind of thing. *sigh*

Obviously the blog survived that TEOTWAWKI attack on the database, though. Not sure what happened to it, but in order to resolve the problem I had to go into uncharted territories . . . into the database of doom. Yep, the inner workings of a database is not something I’m all that familiar with, and I hope I don’t have to go back there again, but some how, some way, I managed to change my password inside the database. It was crazy, it was nuts.

Now, a guest post from “Angry Mike” of MREsource.net. His site has numerous SHTF items. If he runs his business like he runs his guest posts, you get full service. Two things, Angry: 1) I think this is one of your best posts yet, and 2) when you send them, please try sending as Notepad file versus Word. When I copy and past with Word, the post gets filled with piles of lousy HTML. (Not that I don’t appreciate your posts however you send them.) Take it away, Angry.

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hy·brid
n

  1. The offspring of genetically dissimilar parents or stock, especially the offspring produced by breeding plants or animals of different varieties, species, or races.
  2. Something of mixed origin or composition.
  3. Something, such as a computer or power plant, having two kinds of components that produce the same or similar results.
  4. A word whose elements are derived from different languages.

hoopty
n.

Basically, a piece of shit car. Usually cheap and/or broken down. Can be any size, make or model, but must (or should) be embarrassing to drive for some reason, such as when you bump the stereo all the plastic “effects” you have hot-glued to the exterior rattle, instantly betraying the cheapness of your bling.

A hoopty can be anything from a ’78 Cadillac Brogham with the panels missing in front of the brake lights (but replaced on only one side with duct tape), to a fine purple two-year old Hyundai Elantra with three spinner hubcaps and a vanity plate that reads BBY GRL.

The term has also been used in certain circles as an insult to one’s boy or girlfriend, as in scrub or hoochie mama.

  1. Can you believe he be gettin’ all mad whenever somebody lean up against his old stupid hoopty.
  2. I can see now you ain’t nothin’ but a hoopty.

Now that we have a clear and informative definition for each lets examine them both! I am trying to keep all things as even as possible, which simply isn’t possible in this comparison. I am basing this on one hoopty I previously owned against the ever popular Toyota Prius Hybrid.

First we have the Hoopty. The Hoopty in question is a 1979 Ford Fiesta in factory fluorescent Lime Green trim, once owned by me. This fine specimen of a Hoopty was purchased for a whopping $300.00 with 150,000+ miles on it. Its options package included a steering wheel, rusty shifter handle coupled to a somewhat synchronized 4 speed trans, non-reclining custom bent bucket drivers seat, intermittent wipers (they intermittently worked), 260 Air Conditioning (2 open windows, 60 MPH), rust covered steel wheels, scratch and dent glamour package and a wobbling right side head light for intersection and pedestrian safety.

The “Shower and Go” option was courtesy of a rust hole on the roof at the edge of the windshield. Sadly this feature was only available when it was raining and only washed you from the chest up. There was not a factory towel included either. No amount of Bondo, duct tape or silicone sealant would keep this option from working. It was there to stay! No radio, electric anything or climate control package was offered on these piles to my knowledge and there was no way I could find to install anything, including a radio.

This child molester-esque automobile saw me through another 90,000 well beaten miles. I tried to beat the ugly out of it, but was unsuccessful. It died as ugly as it was born with over 240,000 miles on the odometer. The average miles per gallon with the pedal to the metal all the time was around 32-35. It was a fast little car for what it was and well capable of getting out of its own way. The manufacturer boasted a 0 to 50 time (yes 0-50) of 9 seconds. Top speed was around 90 MPH if you had the guts to drive it that fast and were not very concerned with your life. I did once. It was not something I was willing to attempt twice. I think the lack of any accessories or options aided it in speed and fuel economy.

The engine was of the Euro trash variant which I believe was a joint venture between Ford and Opal, somewhere in the 1.5L-1.8L displacement range. Tune ups were excessively cheap at around $65.00 for parts, including an oil change if I did it myself. While browsing Ebay recently, I found a full set of brand new front disc brake pads for this car for $7.00. That’s cheap by everyone’s standards. Anyone with some fair mechanical knowledge and a set of hand tools could fix this car, regardless of what went wrong. The manual brakes on this mean machine were about as large in diameter as the disk brakes currently used on high end all terrain bicycles.

Going was no problem. Stopping was an all together different skill set. During an emergency stop at highway speed, the proper procedure was to down shift directly to second while mashing the manual brake pedal with every ounce of pressure you could muster. You could then expect some wild under steer followed by oversteer and serious brake fade. In other words the car went where it wanted to and did everything it could not to stop. I stopped riding amusement rides at this point in my life as my little fun house on wheels was more excitement than any one should have. Having the entire brake system replaced had no effect on stopping control or distance.

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In order to keep your dignity in this hoopty you needed to wear a ski mask and sunglasses 365 days a year. The Lime Green paint was impossible to miss or laugh at. It wasn’t until my hoopty was near the end of its life that I and it, were vindicated. I was tooling down a traffic light filled two lane highway when I noticed a peculiar sight. A fluorescent Yellow and a Fluorescent Orange Ford Fiesta revving up at the light, ready to race to the end. I of course pulled up on the shoulder in my Lime Green specimen and asked them if they wanted to run it. Everyone pulled off their masks as the Rainbow Bright drag race to 75 MPH began. Uproarious laughter could be heard over the sewing machine engines for several miles and a dozen or so traffic lights until one by one, we parted ways.

So goes the saga of the little Hoopty that could and did. Total investment including repairs, around $1900.00 for the 2 years I owned it. Thankfully it wasn’t my only car but it was my only fuel efficient car at the time.

Enter the Prius Hybrid! Toyota’s MSRP starts at $22,000.00 and goes up to $24,270.00 for additional trim packages. The estimated miles per gallon on these vehicles are 48 City/45 Highway. This vehicle has a basic warrant on 3 years/36,ooo miles on “all components other than normal wear items.” This pretty much means brakes, tires and other parts that may wear out during normal use. The same coverage applies for any Toyota accessories purchased at the time the vehicle is purchased. For dealer installed items such as spinners or other types of bling there is a 12 month/12,000 mile warranty.

The power train warranty is for 60 months/60,000 miles and covers the engine, transmission/transaxle, front-wheel drive, rear-wheel drive, seatbelts and airbags. Rust through protection is for 60 months/unlimited miles. Hybrid related components have an 8 year/100,000 mile warranty but the HV battery warranty may be extended under emissions warranty. All of these are fair warranties in my opinion.

My experience is very limited with these types of vehicles as is my knowledge so I will go on hear-say of a former owner of a Prius as well as the words of a salesman trying to sell me a Prius. According to my friend the battery on these things charge one of two ways. You can plug it in to the wall and watch your electric meter spin so fast it starts to smoke or drive the vehicle at highway speeds for at least an hour.

While chatting with a rather inept salesman I asked about the HV battery and the cost of it, if it were out of warranty. He informed me it was “only” around $5000.00 and told me the vehicle would not run without it. I don’t know if the salesman was correct but I know Ford Escape Hybrid batteries were in the same range. He then went in to detail, as best as he could, on the processes, computers and mechanics with specialized training it would take to repair this vehicle.

The only thing(s) I was thinking at this point was $5000.00 for parts…probably $2000.00 for labor and I could have the vehicle running again and I have to make my commute a half an hour longer everyday to keep this golf cart fully charged. And what about an EMP? I’m sure that is not covered under any warranty.

It was then that I decided that the Hoopty is my choice of vehicle. Even if SHTF day never comes. Besides, all of the Hybrid drivers (along with Volvo drivers) seem to love the fast lane and always drive 10 mph under the speed limit and I don’t want to be stereotyped!

~ Angry Mike

Ranger Man BTW: What do you all of think of Sarah Palin?

Is she good – Palin for VP

Or is she bad – PalinSucks.com

As I type this I hear a mouse in my living room wall. :-S Cold weather is approaching. Time for my ultimate mouse trap!

Lastly, the U.S. is selling 1,000 “smart bomb” bunker busters to Israel (read it). Gee, I wonder what country is going to be on the receiving end of these babies.

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{ 13 comments }

irishdutchuncle September 15, 2008

when i have money, i try to put some of it into the wifemobile, (which i think of as the primaryBOV) to try to keep it above hoopty status. it’s a struggle. unless you need to take customers someplace in your own vehicle, it would be foolish not to drive a beater, ( and keep a spare). until all of your important preps are in place, you can’t afford a car payment. who do you need to impress?

Angry Mike September 15, 2008

My sentiments exactly. The Mrs. has the better vehicle and always will. I dont need (or want) a new car or the payment that goes with it. My current vehicle is quite a Hoopty, but its getting there. I bought it new 4 1/2 years ago with the intention of driving it in to the ground, not beating it to death, but keeping it for as long as possible. Its great on gas, has a CD player and A/C, its comfortable and still looks decent. 5 years from now that may be a different story.

Angry Mike September 15, 2008

Oh and RM, I have to agree with you, I think this was my best one to date. As for the MSWord….Notepad doesnt seem to work all that well on my PC after the rug rats had their destructive little ways with it. I will try though.

theotherryan September 15, 2008

We opt for the hoopty. Put the enormous difference in money towards preps or savings.

Jack September 15, 2008

Hoopty for the masses. I bought an old Toyota PU for $1500 when I was stationed in Hawaii. I had to disconnect the battery every night and I always parked on a hill just in case I forgot and the battery drained overnight. I drove the Shumer out of it for 4 years without ever putting any money into it and sold it for $1200. Now that was a great hoopty!

Mayberry September 15, 2008

Another vote for the “hoopty”. Mine is an ’82 Jeep CJ7 that requires regular cash infusions to keep going, but it’s still WAY cheaper than any new vehicle. Even at 15 MPG. But my commute is 4 miles round trip, so I could drive Bigfoot and it wouldn’t break the bank. The wife’s 10 year old Cutlass is the “tripmobile”, cost $4k, and gets near 30 MPG on the highway. It’s sooooo nice to have two titles in hand, and no payments……

BigBear September 15, 2008

Hey, I have the orange hoopty. It is a 78 fiesta gets great gas mileage and fun as hell to drive. The only problem I have had was the alternator fell off…truly as I was driving down the road it fell off and rolled under the car.

Great Car

Fern September 15, 2008

Right now, our “good new” car is a ’99 Ford Contour, got it 3 years ago for under $5K. Our hoopty is a ’92 Buick Regal – every time we stop for a light or stop sign we have to shift into neutral and then back into drive, or it will shift into neutral for us … and stay there.

Now, the story of my old old car, the ’75 Gremlin … that car might still live on the streets of Chicago. I drove it for over a decade, when I got a newer car (from the repo guy a cousin was shacked up with) I gave it to an uncle who drove it for a several years and then he gave it to someone else who drove it for years. By the time I gave it away the body was so rusted that the front fender bent agressively towards the drivers windshield at highway speeds.

Al B. September 15, 2008

Greetings,
I bought a Geo 10 years ago and fell in love. Since then I’ve bought 20 more @ $50. to $200. and am driving a 94 Geo xfi that cost $150. and gets 55+ MPG. We live in the woods aways from town so our round trip cost is about $4. today. Geo’s are easy to work on and with all my extra parts I can build a few ahead of need and safely store some extra brains incase of EMP. Building a few from many makes my Geos true Hoopty Hybrids.
Peace, Al B.

Mama Squirrel September 16, 2008

1995 Toyota SUV. And the sad part is that it runs better than any other car we’ve ever had. So far, all I’ve had to do is wiggle a few wires.

Oh, and Palin….EH! If being a mom and an outdoors woman qualifies one to be a VP, then nominate me for Heaven’s sake! I couldn’t do any worse.

Angry Mike September 16, 2008

Big Bear I have to agree with you, the car was fun as hell to drive. If I could find another one I would probably buy it. The alternator fell off of mine too! Completely off and dented the fuel tank! Some lock washers and locktite ensured that wouldnt happen again.

Chris September 16, 2008

When I was a kid my parents had a 78 or 79 orange Fiesta. We called it the Great Pumpkin. I can remeber that vehicle getting the dog snot run out of it and it always had good milage. My current hoopty is an 80 Ram/Isuzu D-50 that is bright yellow. I have about 1200 into it and have put in a new engine and tranny. I am looking to get some miles out of it as it is getting almost 30 mpg. My big dodge gets about 17 mpg so that stays parked as much as possible.

Marianela Jentsch April 28, 2011

Heya i’m for the first time here. I came across this board and I find It really useful & it helped me out a lot. I hope to give something back and aid others like you helped me.

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